Did You Make All These Things Yourself?

It seems fixing up our house comes in waves. We'll do a lot, then nothing, then a lot, then nothing, then a lot. Or so it seems, anyway.

Drek had Friday off of work and was anxious to get some projects done around the house. I took Ash out for our normal Friday-morning activities. By the time we came back for Ash's nap, Drek had built shelves for his office and cleaned and organized his entire office. Ash took a nap while Drek went out to the garage and when Ash woke up I took her to the park. When we got back, a few hours later, Drek had built a table for the garage, installed a shelf in the garage, and organized and swept the entire garage. He also built me an actual clothesline.

I think the moral of this story is that next time, Ash and I will go to Vegas for three days and when we come home, Drek will have built a new house

Would You Like Some? Wait, Before You Answer That, Are You a Fan of Delicious Flavor?

We met my parents in Vegas so we could celebrate birthdays! Once again, for my Dad's birthday, I attempted to make a Tunnel Of Fudge cake. I'm sure you all remember last year's debacle.  This was my fourth year attempting to make this cake. I hoped to get it perfect. 

I set up all the ingredients: 

I read and re-read the recipe. I checked it several times while making the cake and even set the used ingredients to one side to make sure I added all of them (especially flour).  I put the batter in the oven, crossed my fingers and...

 Look! It looks like a cake! That was a very good sign. 

Alas, I did not grease the inside circle of the bunt pan properly, so the cake didn't slide out as hoped. The outer circle slid out, but the inside circle stayed in. So the presentation of the cake was not perfect.  I tried to hide that as best I could: 

We sung "Happy Birthday' and cut the cake. To my delight, inside was a tunnel of fudge. It worked! I made a Tunnel of Fudge with an actual tunnel of fudge! Hooray! 

It was delicious. Also, as a note, it is even better the day after, and even more delicious the day after that. Which is good, because this cake is so rich you can only eat a little bit at a time. So unless you have twenty people eating the cake, there will be leftovers. Delicious leftovers. 

And next year I'm sure I'll get the presentation perfect. There's always next year...

Ten Oughta Do It, Don't You Think? You Think We Need One More? You Think We Need One More. All Right, We'll Get One More

Just got back from a wonderful vacation! While there we had an adventure I thought I'd share:

Thursday night my parents were wonderful enough to put Ash to bed and stay with her while Drek and I had a night out on the town. And what better town than Las Vegas?! Out hotel was only a few miles away from the strip, so we took the hotel shuttle. It dropped us off at the Caesar's Palace and Drek and I walked next door to pay a visit to one of my favorite places in the world: in front of the Belagio at night, watching the fountains dance (To frank Sinatra's "Luck Be A Lady Tonight", but that part just makes it perfect, it's not critical).

This time, the song playing was "Proud To Be an American" and the fountains danced with power and height and oomph. What a grand sight.

We then decided that more than anything else in Vegas, we really wanted to see the Body World exhibit at the Luxor. So we walked all the way to the other end of the strip. The exhibit was amazing. I can't tell you how much I loved it. The first thing I looked at was a leg bone with a few muscles attached and had the word "tensor fascia lata" written on it. I was delighted. I haven't heard that word since school. I was immediately flooded with memories of my awesome anatomy class taught by my awesome anatomy teacher. Flooded with happy memories, I skipped over to the next display: the actual bones of the inner ear. I think I actually squealed.  They are the smallest bones in the body and the first ones I memorized. I don't think I had ever seen them before. They are so tiny! And it just got better from there. Really, it was a magnificent experience. So worth it.

After we left the exhibit we walked all the way back down the strip. Once again we stopped in front of the Belagio and watched the fountains. This time they danced to Clare De Lune with grace and delicacy. It was beautiful. And so appropriate, since Drek and I had just watched Oceans 11 the night before. It's one of our favorites.

We rushed back to the shuttle stop with just a few minutes to spare. We boarded and to our surprise the shuttle was a lot more full than when we rode it before. Every seat was taken and almost everyone had someone on their lap. There were a few places where six people were crammed into two seats and there were even people sitting in the aisle. We sat in the aisle and then a couple got on behind us. The shuttle was packed.

Luckily, everyone was either in a very good mood, or drunk. People were laughing and making jokes, shouting out to each other and to the shuttle driver. It was a very lively ride back to the hotel. A perfect end to a wonderful date, and to a wonderful vacation.

And Called Us With an Holy Calling, Not According to Our Works, but According to His Own Purpose and Grace, Which was Given Us in Christ Jesus Before the World Began

I like my calling. I teach the twelve and thirteen year old Sunday School Class. There are a few fourteen year olds in there as well. Usually I have fourteen people in my class, but if we have visitors it can be more. That is a lot of teenagers to have in one room, and I am not the best at keeping order. In fact, I'm really bad at discipline. But I'm working on it.

Here's the thing: As of December 31, 2010, there are 28,660 LDS wards and branches in the world. I have no idea how many of those wards and branches are English-speaking, but it is not a small number. Now, take into account that not all of those English-speaking wards have a twelve and thirteen year old Sunday School Class (because they are singles wards or just don't have the youth) and you are left with, what? It's got to be around 10,000 English-speaking teachers called to serve as their ward's twelve and thirteen year old Sunday School Class teacher.

One of the amazing things about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is how universal it is: Every twelve and thirteen year old Sunday school class teacher teaches from the same manual: The Presidents of the Church. There is even a lesson schedule, so all wards are on the same lesson, give or take a ward conference. Most teachers are called for more than one year, so they teach the same lessons multiple times, depending on how many years they have this calling. So, on any given Sunday, I'm guessing that there are around ten thousand people teaching the same lesson I am teaching, to the same age group I am teaching. Some with more experience than me.

The Internet is a wonderful thing. It connects all sorts of people. I'm thinking the Internet should connect me to those ten thousand people. Seriously, how is there not already a forum for us to be like: "I had a great idea for lesson 33!" or "I tried this with my class, but they did not take it well. I would suggest going with out the..." or "For this last class I did this and the kids responded so well!"

Is there something like out there? Please say yes. I so desperately need some help with my lesson plans.

Happy Birthday to You!

Two years ago today, the best thing ever happened. 

It changed my life completely, and made it so much better.

For two years now my life has revolved not around me, but around my little one.

And I wouldn't want to live life any other way. 

Happy Birthday, my little princess!

I am so glad you are my daughter

and I am your mama.

As Advertised, Lots of Needles and Cold Exam Tables. I Heard You Had Some Excitement

I got suckered into getting a tetanus shot this week. That was no fun.

I went to the doctor to get a prescription for an infection I have (unsuccessfully) tried to fight for an entire month. She was really nice, gave me the prescription and then asked when I had last been tested for TB.

"Never? Because I do not live in the eighteen hundreds?"

"Not even when you were pregnant?"

"No...does pregnancy give you TB?"

It was odd. She asked if I wanted to be tested. Again, what an odd question. Who answers yes?

And then she asked when I last had a tetanus shot.

"...Um, when I was ten? Maybe seven?' I thought about getting one when I was eighteen, does that count?"

She said that me getting a shot would help protect Ash. Grrr. I hate when herd immunity works against me.

So I let her give me the shot. And I was trying to be all cheerful about it because Ash was watching.

"Look! How fun! The nice nurse is going to give mama a shot! Hooray!"  While whispering to the nurse: "Hey, so, I'm deathly afraid of needles so please don't let me see it, or I might pass out."

Good times.

The nurse warned me that my arm would hurt the day after. She was not kidding. I was also so very tired all of yesterday. That might have been because of the antibiotics, but last night I dreamed it was because my tetanus shot actually gave me tetanus. Luckily, that does not seem to be the case as I am back to normal energy levels today. Maybe It was TB.

It's Not Enough to Survive. One Must be Worthy of Survival

Yesterday afternoon the power went out. I didn't know how widespread the blackout was, so I thought I would hop in the car and drive over to Drek's work. Maybe we could hang out in his air-conditioned office for an hour, or maybe his power was out and he could come home early! 

His work is only five miles away. It usually takes ten minutes to drive there. Traffic was much worse than normal (all the traffic lights were out) so when I got to Drek's office, thirty minutes later, and discovered his power was out and he had gotten a ride home, I was a little upset. It then took me forty minutes to make it back home. That was when I learned the blackout was widespread, and there was no timeline given to when power would be restored. 

 We realized we don't really have a functioning radio. Luckily, our awesome neighbors next door had their radio on outside and had the volume turned up really loud. We just opened out windows and could hear the news updates. but still, we might need to get our own radio. And also maybe a generator. 

We ate a small dinner, went on a small bike ride, called my dad instead of Skyping him to wish him a happy birthday, and then looked around at each other. "What do we do now?" We couldn't watch another episode of my new obsession: Battlestar Gallactica, and our dinner plans were obviously cancelled. So how to keep ourselves entertained?

The blackout must have had an impact on our psyche, because it got a little barbaric: We went Caterpillar hunting. 

These horned cattipilars were munching on our tomato plants without authorization. So we brutally tracked down seven of them, including what we hope was the ringleader, and made an example out of them to all the other catipillars still in hiding; we fed them to the chickens. I know it was extreme, but we couldn't be lenient; Desperate times and all that. 

I celebrated Labor Day by getting up early to go to the gym for a two hour Zumba class. I've only done Zumba once before. It was fun, so I thought signing up for another class would be fun!

It was only when I got there that I realized going from nothing to a two hour Master Zumba class might be a bad idea. Maybe.

But I had fun. Zumba is a lot of fun, and the teacher was hilarious. It was a great class. My knee did not have fun. The last time it hurt like that was the final three miles in my half marathon. My knee was angry.

But not as angry as my muscles are today. Three days later, I am mostly unable to walk. Ouch.

And yet, I'm hoping for another two hour master Zumba class.

Do You Realize What This Means? It Means Bankruptcy and Scandal and Prison! That's What It Means! One of Us is Going to Jail... Well, It's Not Gonna be Me!

I lose things all the time. I lost my keys back in April. I still haven't found them. It actually worked out great because it was after I gave the apartment keys back to the landlord and before Drek gave me the keys to the new house. So I only lost my car keys. Actually, Drek still hasn't given me a key to the new house. He thinks I will lose it.

I love those front doors that have keypads on it, so you don't have to carry a key around. It's great, but not ideal. My dream home would have a voice recognition lock for the front door, so I don't have to have a key or fiddle with a code.  I would come home and say "open." And the door would unlock and swing wide open for me. And the house would say "Welcome home, K La. You left your phone in the kitchen. You have three missed calls. Shall I call them back for you?" 

That house would rock. 

But that is not the point of this post. The point of this post is savings; In January Drek and I sat down to do some major budgeting. We decided get rid of all credit cards, only use debit cards for emergencies, and switch to a cash-in-envelopes system. I love this system. It has worked out well for us. The point was to make money a real, tangible thing; If you have the bills sitting in your hand you can spend them, but when it's gone, it's gone. At the start of each month I take the envelopes to the bank and withdraw cash to put in the envelopes and use the cash for the rest of the month. Our envelopes are labeled "Gas Money", "Groceries", "Water Bill" and such. My favorite envelope says "Cruise Fund" and it works like this: At the end of the month, if I have extra money in any of the envelopes, say because I was so good on my grocery budget, or we went under on our water bill, I take the extra money and put it into the "Cruise Fund" envelope. If I go over in any area, I have to take money out of the "Cruise Fund" envelope. The point being that at the end of the year, if Drek and I have saved enough money in our "Cruise Fund" envelope, we get to go on a cruise! It's a great incentive to stay within the budget and keeps me optimistic about future vacation plans. 

Because this envelope gets the extra from all the other envelopes, it has a lot of one and five dollar bills in it. The envelope was getting quite fat because of this, so yesterday I decided to take it, along with all the other envelopes, with me to the bank, where I could get the smaller bills turned into bigger bills. 

Mornings are always hectic and after throwing everything in the car and dropping Drek off at work, I went to the grocery store with our bank located inside. I grabbed all the envelopes and took them inside with me. The bank didn't open for another ten minutes, but I couldn't wait because I had to meet people at the park in ten minutes. I threw the envelopes back in the car and drove to the park. I was early, so I thought that I better sort the envelopes. It was then that I realized I was missing the "Cruise Fund" envelope, with all the cash that I had scrimped and saved over the last nine months still inside. I panicked. 

I searched through the whole car. I drove back to the bank and looked around the parking lot and under cars. I went back inside and talked to the guy. I talked to the teller (the bank was now open). My envelope was nowhere to be seen and there was nothing I could do to reclaim the lost money. I described the envelope to the teller and explained what the money represented. She was very sympathetic and said she'd keep an eye out for it (or anyone depositing money from an envelope with with pink writing on it) but there was really  nothing she could do. 

I got back in my car and tried to calm myself down. After thinking things through, I decided to drive back to my house to see if the envelope had fallen out in the garage or on the way to the car. I went home and looked all over; no envelope. I then looked up where we keep all the envelopes and there it was: I had never taken it out of its spot. 

I sighed a huge sigh of relief and very carefully took the envelope to the car. I drove back to the bank and took it up to the teller.

 "You found it!" she cheered, when I showed it to her. 

"Yes, Thankfully." I said. "Can I turn these into bigger bills?" 

The teller looked at me and with a shy smile asked "Do you want to deposit it into a savings account? I'll keep it safe for you until the end of the year." 

So that's what I did. It isn't keeping the Cruise Fund tangible, but it does keep me from losing it, and that's a bit more important right now.  We'll still budget the exact same way, the only difference being that now I'm taking money out of the envelopes and handing it to a teller. 

This Was My First Bus Ride

This city needs to work on it's public transportation. Time to drive to a museum: Nineteen minutes. Time taking public transportation to museum: Three hours and twelve minutes.

Yikes. 

We live on a dead-end dirt road. We are the second-to-last house on this dead-end road. The only cars that drive passed our house are the cars belonging to our neighbor. There aren't even any lost drivers, because it's much easier to turn around before you get to our house than after. I love this about our road. It's not a great location for yard sales, but it's fantastic for a quiet neighborhood. 

Our neighborhood is also far from bus stops. It is highly impractical to ride the bus because of where we live. So i stared dreaming of biking everywhere we needed to go. Drek has a bike, and Ash has a tricycle, but I don't have a bike and Ash can't really ride her trike down the driveway, let alone down the road. 

Last week my brilliant sister-in-law gave me a bike trailer. We hooked it up to Drek's bike and it worked wonderfully. Ash loves to ride in it, stays quiet no matter how long the trip is, and begs to go for more rides. The next day I looked up women's bikes on Craig's list. The day after that Drek and I were driving down our road and were surprised to see our neighbor had a bike in their front yard with a big "For Sale" sign stuck to it. We stopped the car, glanced over the bike and then asked "do they really think they are going to sell that bike? It's not like there is a lot of through traffic." And indeed, the only through traffic would be us and our neighbors. but apparently that was all they needed because we bought the bike. It works great, it looks awesome, and this week I hooked it up to the trailer, packed Ash inside and biked to the grocery store and back. 

I'm so excited for our new mode of transportation. It is way better than a car and way better than walking. I got so excited about it that I've started planning on biking to the nearest bus station and taking the bus to places that are too far to bike. It's still not a great system, the buses really are a joke, but it does open up a few more possibilities. 

I Think It's Brilliant! I Think It's Stellar! Uh, Apart From the One, Obvious, Tiny, Little Baby Little Hiccup... That I Don't Play a Musical Instrument. Yessir. A Tiny, Insignificant Detail

When I was little, I thought the concept of a piano was so odd. Who came up with the idea of a piano? How did we go from banging on drums, to playing something as complex as a piano? Or a violin for that matter. I understand harps, but how did we get a guitar? Or a trombone? 

I wondered if I got stuck in an alternate universe at the start of civilization, would I be able to reproduce any musical instruments? I don't play any. I've never studied music; Could I even make a basic drum? Would my drawings of the instruments I know inspire odd, hybrid types of instruments? Who invents instruments anyway? Why does music change every year, but the instruments stay the same? 

Today I learned that there already are odd, hybrid types if instruments. For instance, here is something called a harp guitar: 

And this is a Sousaphone:

I also saw an electric ukulele and got to play a keytar (The keytar I already knew existed as I got to see one played live a few years ago at a rock concert by Mutemath).

I learned that inventing musical instruments was a popular thing to do a hundred years ago and actually, still is a popular thing to do.

I think I should learn to play a harp guitar. I wonder if I can find a local teacher.

If Those are to be the First of Many Injuries to Come, it Would be Wise to Find a Suitable Excuse. Polo, for Instance. I'm Not Learning Polo, Alfred

I have not attended many sporting events during my life. The ones I have attended have been... forgettable. I'm a fan of playing sports, just not watching strangers play sports. 

But this sport was a lot of fun to attend. A truly unforgettable experience: 

Polo.

Yup. Big hats, champagne, and duvet-stomps. It was so much fun.

Did you know each polo player has twelve horses? He switches them out during the game. I learned all sorts of fun things like that.

As fun as the game was to watch, the best part was that there was a bounce house for the kids. Nothing is more entertaining than watching toddlers bounce around it a cage. I need one of those for my backyard.

Yea, is this Another One of Your Little 'Projects'?

When Drek and I were first married, we were given a card table and four folding chairs as a present. That table and chairs saw a lot of use. They became our kitchen table and chairs for almost two years. When I inherited an old table and several old chairs from my aunt and uncle, the folding table became our main game table. 

The Table I inherited was awesome, but the chairs showed their age a bit more, I'm afraid. I tried to sand them and refinish them, but I was pregnant and then I had a newborn and then I couldn't do it outside because  I would have frozen...blah blah blah. Drek said if I didn't finish the chairs by the time we moved out of Burgville, the chairs were not coming with us. I managed to finish two and a half chairs. They moved with us, the rest of the chairs did not. 

A few months ago I found a dining table with eight chairs for sale on Craigs list. It was a great deal. I snatched it up because the table and chairs were in great condition, even if the chairs looked a bit...

 Grandma-y. They looked like old people chairs. After quizzing my friends on the chairs, I finally decided to re-upholster them. I've never re-upholstered chairs before, and the last chair project turned out to be such a disaster that I was very hesitant. But I gathered advice, talked to my all knowing sister-in-law who has experience with such things, and decided to give it a try. I waited until we got a couch, so I could match the kitchen chairs to the couch, since there is no wall dividing them in our house. I picked out the fabric and after several days of procrastinating, I began my project. I striped off the chairs:

cut the fabric, attached the fabric (after Drek gave me a quick lesson on staple guns) then cut the plastic and attached the plastic. The last step was to re-attach the cushion to the chair: 

 old chair: 

 new chair:

I finished the whole thing in four hours. 

 This just may be the best project I have ever done. It turned out way better than expected. It turned out so well, I made a cake:

(ok, so the cake was a birthday cake for a friend, not for the chairs, but it was still a delicious cake)

I think this dining room set will last us quite a while. At least the next five years. And if we change the couched, now I know I can change the chairs to match!

You're Gonna Need a Bigger Boat

Yesterday I went to the beach with a Kayak and snorkeling equipment and the rumor that sometimes during this time of year you can see leopard sharks in certain areas.

Alas, I forgot the kayak paddle, so our ability to get to those "certain areas" was greatly impeded. We tried using raft paddles, but it was slightly ridiculous. So, after a bit we put on the fins and tried to swim the kayak. That didn't work out too well.  Finally we gave up and tried to paddle back to the shore. When we got far enough in, I jumped out of the kayak so I could walk. It was just faster that way.

Unexpectedly, I jumped out and realized I was surrounded by half a dozen leopard sharks. And not the small ones I thought I would see, these ones were about two or three feet long! It was amazing. I couldn't touch one, but I was about a foot away. They were so beautiful! It was absolutely amazing.

They didn't stay very long, and it was hard to find them after that, but it was so worth the trip!

I Haven’t Seen One of those Since I Was a Webelos. What’s a Webelos? It’s Half Way Between a Cub Scout and a Boy Scout. And What Does a Webelos Do? Gets Badges, Mostly

Two weeks I was given a calling in my ward: to teach the twelve and thirteen year old Sunday School Class. The man who offered me the calling said there were "only a few" kids in the class now, but there would be more in January. I paused. "Will I have this calling January?" I asked. He laughed and said I could count on being in this calling for a while.

Which is odd, considering for the last several callings I've accepted and then asked "Do you realize I am moving in four months?" But now we are not moving for several years. It was an odd sense of... permanence.

Anyway, I emailed the Sunday School President and asked the details of my class; how many kids, what were their names, when and where did we meet...

He emailed back that he had no idea I'd been called. He was glad, but surprised. He said I had eight kids in my class.

EIGHT? Eight is a lot.

So today was my first day teaching. I found the room and walked in. There were three boys inside, playing with a Rubik's cube. Then two girls came in. Then two more boys. Then another girl. Then three more girls.

Eleven. There are eleven kids in my class.

Actually, it went well. I think. You'd have to ask them. They like to talk, but once I started the lesson, they were very good at listening. They are fun, polite, and funny. I think the lesson went well.

I need to keep in mind that while the lesson is supposed to be an hour long, these kids socialize so much that I only have about fifteen minutes to teach them. Which is fine. I just need to simplify:  get to the point and make it memorable. Period.

Meanwhile, Drek got called to scouts. He is a Webelo leader.

She Swallowed the Goat to Catch the Dog. She Swallowed the Dog to Catch the Cat. She Swallowed the Cat to Catch the Bird. She Swallowed the Bird to Catch the Spider that Wiggled and Wiggled and Tickled Inside Her

For some much-needed family time, we decided to take a trip to the zoo in the middle of the week for no real reason. Just so we could be together. We walked down a delightful trail I had never seen before, and after an hour decided to stop for some dinner. I unpacked our food from my backpack and picked a table next to an animal enclosure. In the enclosure we could see a Forest Buffalo, happily munching on his own dinner:

We started eating. Ash dropped a crumb on the ground and a very small bird immediately flew down to grab it. Drek began tearing off small pieces of food and throwing it to the bird. Soon we had four birds eating on the ground next to our table.
"A mouse!" Drek cried in surprise, and sure enough, a tiny mouse had joined in the dinner party.
"A monkey!" I shouted, seeing a Swamp Monkey swoop over the enclosure and sit in the tree right above us. Drek thought I was kidding, until he saw it himself.
"A rabbit!" Drek laughed. This time, I thought Drek was kidding, but indeed a tiny bunny had come out of the bushes to eat with the birds and the mouse.
I tried to get a video of all of them, but the bunny was a bit shy:

After dinner was over, we walked around the enclosure and discovered that we were two otters eating on the other side of the fence from where we ate.

It's too bad they didn't poke their nose through the bushes to join the party. That would have been quite a sight. 

No. I thought You Were Swans

I got beaten up by a goose. No, really. A goose. A gander. An African fowl. It's true.

My awesome neighbor owned three geese. He is, sadly, moving, so he needed to sell his geese. When a guy came to buy them, my neighbor asked if I would catch the geese and put them in the boxes the buyer had brought so they could move to their new home. Of course I said yes. Who would turn down the opportunity to wrangle some geese?

And wrangle I did. I went after the male first. I cornered him fairly easily and grabbed him by the neck (the only advice I got from my neighbor). I then tried to pick him up in a sort of modified football hold, but in doing so he kicked my with his webbed foot. You wouldn't think a webbed foot would do much damage, but take it from me; don't underestimate the webbed foot. I did finally get him in the box and the two female geese were quicker, but once I caught them they were easy to put in their boxes. The buyer took them home, happy to have a birthday present for his daughter and my neighbor was thrilled to have the geese go to a good home. I'm thrilled to have them gone. Yes, I will miss the goose eggs (delicious and huge!) but it's nice to be able to carry on a conversation in the backyard. It's so much more peaceful now!

At first I had three giant claw marks on my arm from where the goose scratched me. The next day, I had three huge black and purple bruises appear, each surrounding the three scrapes. After a few days, the bruises turned yellow. They are finally vanishing, and the scrapes have healed, but for a while there it looked like I had been attacked by a tiger.

So next time you get in a fight with a goose, remember the thing to fear is not the beak, but the dreaded webbed foot.

Who's that? Who Else Would it Be? It's Me! Are... Are You My Conscience?

I am very hard on me cell phones: I drop them all the time, I sit on them, I drop them in water... This results in me needing a new phone more often than normal people. This also results in an ever-changing contact list. Every time I get a new phone I lose phone numbers. Normal people would solve this by posting that they got a new phone and would everyone please text them so they can make sure they have every one's number, but since this is a regular occurrence for me, I just don't bother to tell anyone I've lost their number. Again.

I deal with it like this: I get a text from a number I don't have in my current contact list. The text is friendly and personable, so I know that the person texting knows me and thinks I know them. I just don't know who they are because I've lost their number. I love it when this happens. It has become a game: Can I figure out who they are without them knowing that I am trying to figure it out? So I'll send back a text, trying to get them to text me again, hopefully with clues about the person's identity. It looks something like this:

Them: "I'm visiting my mom for the weekend, are you free for lunch?"

Me: "Oh! How is your mom? When works for you?"

Them: "She's better than last time. Anytime works for me, I don't have a child to worry about."

Me: "Glad to hear she's better. And how are you? Anything new?"

Them: "Same old Same old."

Me: "Ha! Me too. Where do you want to go to lunch?"

Them: "We should go to that Indian place we went Freshman year"

Me: (Now that I finally have a hint I can be more specific in my questioning) "I thought you said that Indian Food always looks like it is going to crawl off your plate and eat you."

Them: "Ha! Kate said that, not me! I LOVE Indian food!"

Me: "Oh, yes. That was Kate. Well, I always have time for you, Liz, So call me the first day you are here and we will go out."

Them "Great! Can't wait to see you!"

Me (bwhahaha. I win) "you too!"

But sometimes I just never figure it out. Last week I got a text that said "Hey! I saw that there is a huge sand sculpture event going on in your state. I just wanted to let you and your family know in case you wanted to go!"

So, obviously the person knows me, and knows where I live. I texted back something like "That does sound like a lot of fun! Thanks so much!" And then they texted back something entirely generic. Alas, I had misplaced my phone before I could find out more about them, so I never did discover who they were. But, I did, in fact, go to the sand sculpture event. It WAS a lot of fun. So thank you, whoever you are. I'm sorry I've lost your number, you seem to know just what I think is a great way to spend an afternoon.

Has Anyone In This Family Actually Seen a Chicken?

Having chickens has turned out to be thoroughly entertaining. We let them free range and they have been so good about staying in our yard and going back into their coop as soon as the sun sets. Drek feeds them leftovers from dinner, so now during dinner the chickens line up outside the sliding glass door and tap on the glass in an attempt to beg for food.

But the best was a few days ago: We had a four year old over at our house to play. I was around the corner with Ash when I heard a ear-shattering scream. It was as if he had just came face to face with the Grim (That's a symbol of Death that will eat your face off, for the Non-Harry Potter fans). I dashed around the corner and saw him pointing in terror. "Look!" he gasped "A Chicken!" and there, three feet away, was indeed, Juliette; happily pecking the grass.

I giggled. "Takes one to know one, kid."  Alas, my quick wit was lost on him. But I'm sure Juliette thought it was funny.

Looks to Me Like an Illegal Salvage Operation. It Does? That's Discouraging

Ok, This project actually turned out kind of well...

Behold: 

Really comfy, very old and beat-up patio chairs.  

When Rissy came to visit, we figured out how to remove the old fabric and theoretically install new fabric. She also became chief spray paint advisor and executive spray painter. Thanks to her, the painting went great. After that I was left with this: 

Which I turned into this:

 which became this:

It turned out so well, this evening my family sat out on our porch, enjoying our new patio set and eating homemade chocolate ice cream with the best homemade fudge sauce you have ever tasted. Ever.

Ok, so I didn't actually make the fudge sauce, but I did make the ice cream! Which is something I've never done before. And it was very delicious.