Thursday, May 03, 2012

Michael Jordan Plays Ball. Charles Manson Kills People. I Talk. Everyone Has a Talent

Actual phone conversation from yesterday:

Her: "I was just calling to let you know about our Relief Society activity next week."
Me: "Oh, yes. I have it on my calendar and am actually working out a carpool. I will be there!"
Her: "Great! Well, it's a talent show, are you planning on performing?"
Me: "Ha! No. Very no. I wouldn't want to subject the poor sisters to anything I could perform."
Her: "Well, everyone has different talents. This activity is to showcase all different kinds of talents. You don't have to sing or do a dramatic play, you could bring something that you've sewn. I don't know if you sew.
Me: "I don't"
Her: "Or something you've knitted. We have sisters bringing photographs and artwork.
Me: "I'm not really a crafty person. At all. Really. I don't have anything I can showcase."
Her: "We'll have display tables set up. You don't even have to stand in front of everyone, you can just have something on the tables.You could even bring something you've grown in your garden. I know you have a garden."
Me: "Oh, well, yes, but it's in the ground. And it's not really my garden, it's more of a team effort. It can't really be called my talent.
Her "Maybe something you've cooked?"
Me: "We have so many talented sisters in the ward, I'm sure the night is already scheduled."
Her: "Well, actually, we're asking every sister to share a talent. This night isn't about sitting and watching, it's about sharing the gift you've been given. We need everyone to share their talent."
Me: "Uh-huh. You know, I think I'm busy that night..."

She said she'd talk to me on Sunday to get my talent on the program. Sigh

Talent. I just don't have it. I am not being modest, I am accepting reality. So, aside from flying Krisling out here so we can do the light saber Jedi-duel we practiced (but never performed because I am not talented in light saber dueling) for our college talent show, I just don't have any ideas. I asked my friend about it, and she suggested I use one of my blog posts. Which, despite the fact that blogging isn't really a talent, and as far as blogs go, this doesn't make the list of "top fifty best blogs I've ever read",  is actually a fantastic idea. It's something small that won't draw a lot of attention, and this blog is public on the internet so how much harder can it be to display a single post on a table?

I could use some help. Is there a blog post of mine you've found particularly read-worthy? Maybe one that made you laugh out loud or one that you thought was just a touch insightful? I'm not looking for a post worthy of a Peabody award, just one that I can share without dying of embarrassing. Maybe I've written a post without any grammatical or spelling errors (now that would be beyond my talent)?

9 comments:

  1. Some of my favs...

    Friday, April 08, 2011
    Something About Tentacles, Got It. On Your Mark, Get Set, Go!

    Tuesday, December 20, 2011
    You Know What Would Pick Up the Morale in Here? Flip-Flop Fridays. You Can Feel the Breeze in Your Toes

    Tuesday, December 13, 2011
    Now, Before we Learn How to Build the Latest in Extreme Graphic Chipset Processors, Let's Recite the Code of the Elves, Shall We?

    Monday, January 16, 2012
    Live Every Week Like It's Shark Week

    Wednesday, January 04, 2012
    The Truth Is... I am a Member of a Joint NSA CIA Black Ops Team that is Stationed Here in Burbank. I Have a Level 6 Clearance and My Code Name is Charles Carmichael. I'm a Spy, Buddy

    ****Friday, February 03, 2012
    It's About to Get Very Cold in Here

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  2. Another thought is to glance through your blogger management page and see which posts got the most views or the most comments.

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  3. Good idea...how do I do that? I don't actually have any blogging talent so...help!

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  4. I second Drek and if you don't do that then Shark Week.

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  5. Also http://bannanablog.blogspot.com/2006/08/so-tired-everything-is-funny.html

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  6. Although the blog talent is a great idea, why not grab a chair and give the sisters a 1 minute shoulder massage? Or demonstrate simple infant massage techniques on a doll. It would be a lot more work than sticking something on a table but you might win an award for best talent of the night! Another idea- do you have any short stories you could share? How about a stack of copies of a recipe for a vegetarian dish you love or have created?

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  7. I will look back through when I can get computer time instead of tablet time. The few that come to mind are the one where Drek is a spy or you bake chocolate chip cookies at church. You frequently make me laugh so I know there are more. But instinctively I say the spy one. :-)

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  8. You could really stir things up by posting the one about the word of wisdom and vegetarians....I did love the chocolate chip cookies at church one, but one of the ones about a party would be a good choice because it's sharing your hostess talent too.

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  9. I agree with the blog link above. :)

    Why not print out (even just the first chapter) of one of your NaNoWriMo stories? That's a huge accomplishment and a great talent.

    Also, the infant massage demonstration has pertinent value.

    Or you could single-handedly create a Saboteur-like game and get everyone to play. Perhaps hiding the talent tables and making them search through clues to see all the talents?

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FYI...
If, in your comment, you do not use code names as I do in my blog, I will edit your comment before I post it.