Monday, November 20, 2006

Pavor Nocturnus

Last night I had a Night Terror.
This is all sorts of frustrating because 1) I haven't had one in months 2) I still don't know why I'm having them and 3) I'm not even a teenager anymore, I should not be having them at all. grrr.
Anyway. It was a pretty mild one and except for the feeling of impending death and the desperately wanting to resort to old habits, it was fine. This morning I awoke and much to my surprise found that the feeling was not gone. I think the feeling is generally characterized as "anxiety," but it seems like much more than that while your experiencing it. It's more like knowing that any moment a cataclysmic disaster is going to happen. You want to dig your nails into something, anything. You want to hide in a dark cave and be be swallowed up forever. It's not fun.
Anyway, the feeling most of the day. Luckily, little girl was feeling especially cling-y today so I got to hold on to her for most of the day.
Afterward I went over to Krisling's apartment. Because she is a saint, she let me wash her dishes and organize her pots and pans. I'm sure she wanted me out of her kitchen and to stop touching her things, but she didn't say anything. It helped tremendously. We watched "Invader Zim" and sometime between Grr becoming the house and Zim writing a note to his past self the feeling went away. Thank goodness.
Also, Thanks to Krisling I now have Halloween pictures that I actually took, rather than stealing them of QUARK. That blog post has been updated.

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