If You Don't Like Them We Can Take Them Back. All Right, I Don't Like Them. You'll Get Used to Them.

My big project was to take an old dining room set (one table with two leaves, eight chairs and one china cabinet) and make it look awesome. I have never worked with wood before. I will never work with wood again.

The table turned out good despite me. I was surprised at how good it looks. The cabinet, well, could be better, but it looks fine. The chairs...What a disaster. I will post pictures and details when I am actually finished, but right now I am three days into the disaster and see no hope of being done anytime soon. Anyway, here is my new dining room:


After I got everything moved I rearranged every cupboard in my kitchen. I also rearranged all the pictures on the first level since the cabinet took the place of a picture I have to have hanging up all the time. I took in this whole project to clean out the garage, which is now (almost) clean and has Jasmine sleeping soundly, happily, and safely inside.

To recap; in the last two weeks I have rearranged the garage, the kitchen, the dining room, the bedroom, Drek's office, the laundry room, the linen closet, my closet (four times) the spare room (three times) and the master bedroom (twice). The only rooms I have not completely reorganized are the bathrooms and the living room.

I'm The Money. Every Penny Of It.

I went into the credit union closest to our house. I needed to open up an account for my now profitable business. I did not use he bank I am currently with, because it is in another town. I wanted something local. I went in, sat down, waited for the "new accounts" guy, talked to him, filled out paperwork, answered questions, showed ID, blah blah blah.

The guy asked for a beneficiary. I, of course, told him my husband, Drek. I then gave him Drek's information. He did a little more fiddling on the computer and then said; "You know you already have an account here?" I give him a blank look.

"I'm pretty sure I don't have an account here."

"Drek has an account here; he put you on it."

I am puzzled. "Here? Drek has an account here?"

Now he is puzzled. "Yes, and you are on it. It is a joint account." I am searching through my brain trying to figure out what this guy is talking about. Drek has a secret bank account? Why wouldn't he have told me? Do I know about this? Am I supposed to know about this? Why would he have another account?

The banker guy is intimidated by my blank stare. "Well, let me make sure..."

He types a little. "K la. Right?"

"Yes. He better not have anyone else on his secret account." He reads the address. It is my old address. I confirm it. He looks at the screen nervously. He pauses, and looks back at me.

"Did you not know he had an account here?"

"No, I did not. How much is in it?

"Around $*,***" I must looked shocked. He glances back at his computer. "Yeah. K La and Drek Lastname."

And then it clicks.

"Oh. Drek Lastname is not my husband. Drek Lastname is my old boyfriend (I know, I know. What can I say? I have a thing for the name). He did have an account here, he put me on it before he went on his mission. I got married before he got back."

The poor banker guy. He now realizes he has made a huge mistake. He tries to figure out if I am a vengeful ex. He tries to back peddle, realizing he should not have told me the amount in the account.

I am highly amused.

I ask him if I can take myself off the account. He looks relieved. He informs me I cannot, the main person on the account has to. I thank him, finish setting up MY account and leave.

And yes, I did email my old boyfriend. Not that it bothers me that my name is on the account, but I think he should know.

E-I-E-I-O

On Monday we took a trip to the petting farm! It was the perfect time to go, there was only one other family (that we saw) there, and all the animals had babies! All the animals were also super-friendly. Most would come right up to the fence to be petted!













This last guy is an alpaca. He cracked me up.

I'm so excited! Today I taught an infant massage class and my business in now, officially, "in the black!"

The best part was that Drek came to the class. He did such a great job massaging our niece!

Squee!

Give a Man a Fire and You'll Keep Him Warm For A Day. Set A Man on Fire and You'll Keep Him Warm For The Rest Of His LIfe

Rissy gave her farewell talk in Sacrament meeting yesterday. She talked on service and did a fantastic job. At the end she bore her testimony in Japanese. Everyone was quite impressed.

Afterwards we went to a party at her house. We had the most delicious curry and chutney. I need to figure out how to make chutney.

Anyway, she leaves on September 9th. She will be a fantastic missionary.

I'm not really sure what I'm going to do without her.

Didn't Your Mother Ever Tell You Not To Play With Your Food?

Today I was sitting on my bed, singing songs and making exaggerated facial expressions (nine-month-olds are so much fun!!) when Drek comes upstairs and says "There is a mouse in the downstairs bathroom. It ran under the cupboard."

What?! Like a real mouse? Like a live mouse? Like a real live mouse? In our house? It took me a while to understand. Finally, Drek got it through my head that he saw a mouse in our downstairs bathroom and when the mouse saw Drek, it ran under the cupboard and got away.

Now this is a conundrum. I don't want to use a mousetrap; it might work and we don't want that! Should we call the landlord? We can't just let the mouse stay, can we? Maybe we could cohabit in peace?

Acouchi had a better idea. All those weeks of grasshopper-hunting were just getting her warmed up! This is the cupboard the mouse was hiding under:
Acouchi spent all afternoon guarding it:

In a flash of movement Acouchi has the mouse in her mouth! The game begins!
Acouchi is a fantastic mouser. She cornered the mouse and Drek was able to grab the mouse by its tail and we put it outside. Great job, Acouchi! You deserve a nap:

Snow Cone? Don't Worry. It's Lemon.

Saturday night was our neighborhood block party. We had gotten a flyer advertising the event and had decided to go based on the words "free snowcones". What can I say? Drek really likes snowcones.

Anyway, besides the flyer, there wasn't much else in way of letting us know this event was going on. Because of this, I had assumed it would be a small, mostly forgotten get-together.

I was wrong. Very wrong. Apparently, this neighborhood takes their block parties seriously. Very seriously. There were blow up slides and bounces houses and a blow-up jousting thing. There was a live band and three dinner buffet tables. Hundreds of chairs were set out on the lawns and hundreds of people showed up.

It was fun to talk with the neighbors. Judging by their conversation this block party thing has been a tradition forever. If you miss it I think you are thrown out of the neighborhood. Good thing they had they snowcones.

Hamburgers were supplied by...well, whoever threw the party I guess, as was the cotton candy and the snow cones, but everyone was supposed to bring something depending on your last name. If you were A-H you brought drinks, if you were I-P you were supposed to bring dessert...That sort of thing. There was so much food! One I was done with dinner, I started eying the dessert table. What did I see? A store-bought container of pumpkin-chocolate-chip cookies! Pumpkin-chocolate-chip are my favorite!! Alas, on top of the container was a box of donuts, and I could not figure out how to move the box and get a cookie while looking casual. I walked up and down the dessert table a few times, trying to find a spare space to set the donuts on, but could not. Too many desserts. I finally gave up, got myself an oatmeal cookie (that was amazingly good) and went back to Drek. As soon as I got there I noticed another family arriving at the party with another container of store-bought pumpkin-chocolate-chip cookies. Huzzah!

A few minutes later I walked back to the dessert table to get my cookie. To my surprise, there were now four containers of store-bought pumpkin-chocolate-chip cookies opened and waiting. Hmmm... must have been a sale. I put two on my plate and rejoined Drek. While I was walking toward him, another family was bring another dessert to the dessert table. Can you guess what the dessert was? That's right! Yet another container of store-bought pumpkin-chocolate-chip cookies. A while later it was time for Drek and I to leave the wonderful party. On our way out we passed a latecomer with more store-bought pumpkin-chocolate-chip cookies. That must have been some sale. Or maybe it's part of the neighborhood tradition.

But I Was Netting Butterflies!

For our anniversary (back in July) I had wanted to take Drek to see the musical "The Scarlet Pimpernel" but it wasn't playing until now. So, on our anniversary I gave him the tickets and on Friday Drek and I had a 2nd wedding anniversary celebration version 2.0.
It was amazing! The stage was in the middle of the audience and it rose a story high! The special effects were amazing, the singing was lovely and I had the best date in the whole world. To make it even better, Drek had bought me Lindt chocolate. Yummy!

Afterwards we went home and watched the movie "The Scarlet Pimpernel". Oh, I love that movie so much. I love that I have a husband that wanted to watch that movie. I am so lucky.

Smoking is the Equivalent to Carrying Around a Salt Lick, Laced With a Little Bit of Cyanide

I do not have empathy for smokers. I just cannot grasp the stupidity of people who smoke. When I see an older person smoking, I feel bad for them, I know it's hard to quit blah blah blah...But when I see a young person smoking I just ridicule them. Srsly? You smoke? I cannot even guess how stupid you have to be to start smoking. This only proves my point:

This straight off of Not Always Right (see link on sidebar)

Me: “Can I help you, sir?”

Customer: “A packet of 20 Marlboro Lights, please.”

(I hand him the cigarettes.)

Customer: “Wait, I don’t want these ones.

Me: “Why? They’re Marlboro Lights. Did you change your mind?”

Customer: “No, I don’t want ones with this health warning about cigarettes causing impotency.”

Me: “Ok. Do you want ’smoking harms those around you,’ or ’smoking causes testicular cancer?’”

Customer: “Give me the ‘harms others’ ones.”

Your Baby Blues, So Full Of Wonder

Back in March we bought a Zero Gravity Chair. I love this chair. Acouchi loves it more;





She gets so tired after a long day of grasshopper-hunting.

Our Arrows Will Blot Out The Sun. Then We Will Fight In The Shade. . .

Drek and I have dinner and I get a caving for a late-night apple something. I decide to cook up an apple pastry from scratch using the green apples in our fridge.It turns out amazing (ah, the benefits of working in a bakery) and Drek and I enjoy it while playing my version of two player RISK. I think my strategy is close to flawless, but Drek manages to win in one fatal swoop. Alas, as soon as we leave the game to clean up our plates, Acouchi shows us who really controls the world.
At least she waited until the end of the game.

Look Like They've Jerry-Rigged it With a Pressure Catch. We Could Probably Bypass That Easy.

For the last few months my remote key for my car has been broken. The lock, the trunk, and the alarm buttons all work, but the unlock button does not. It is frustrating to to have to resort to the old fashioned sticking-they-key-in-the-lock way of unlocking the door after being able to get close to the car, push a button and voila! Oh, the hardships.

I have not gotten it fixed because I am too lazy to figure out how. The Saturn dealership. . . left. I heard a rumour all of Saturn was shut down. Maybe not, maybe just our Saturn dealership? Anyway, so who would I go to? Is the government taking over Saturn warranties? Then would I take my key to my congressman? I am jut too lazy to find out.

Today I went over to my sister's house. My niece took my keys and began to push all the buttons. She does this every time she finds my keys. Usually we are too far away for her to set off the car alarm, so I don't see a problem with it. She can push those buttons to her little heart's content as far as I'm concerned.

Afterward, when I went out to the car, I pressed the unlock button out of habit. It worked! My two year old nice fixed my keys!! She's already a genius!

Let's Play

The Ultimate Saboteur was, I think, a huge success.



There is another game next week. I'm not quite sure how it will play out yet.

You Have No Real Talant For Cooking

I attempted Baked Alaska. It was scary, but I really wanted to see if I could make it. Lucky for me, Xirax and Lexi volunteered to be testers.

I used Brownie instead of cake.I thought this would be more delicious. It was, but brownies is harder to mold and harder to cut, so it ruined the visual. Here was the first step:
One layer of brownie, one layer cookies and cream ice cream, and another layer of brownie.
Next you add the meringue:
Bake until a golden brown:
And slice. Or attempt to slice. The brownie made it hard. Next time I will use cake.

You'll Be Dead Within Two Minutes Unless You Do Exactly What I Tell You. I'm All Ears.

Drek and I are taking an Adult/Child/Infant CPR/AED class. This is my fifth time certifying in CPR. My first time was in 2001. The last time was in 2005. My certification has been expired for... um, three years. My WSI certification and my Emergency Responce certification have only been expired for two years. As a side not, my Lifeguard certification expired four years ago. Yeesh, I am so old!

Last night was our first class, we have another one tonight. It was so much fun. None of my other classes were fun, well, except when we certified in my Intro to EMT class and and played Oreo Hockey, but that's not the point.

Chest thrusts have completely changed. Completely. Twice the teacher said "They used to teach CPR this way..." and in fact they did. That was the way I learned it. That is not the way they teach it now. Now it is more efficient and saves more lives.

The thing that shocked me the most was the breathing barrier. I have one from 2003 that is a little bigger than my hand. It is a plastic mask that resembles an oxygen mask...well, it is an oxygen mask. It has two attachments, one for an air tank and one for a mouth. You have to be trained on how to position the mask, how to seal it, how to clean it and so forth. I keep in in the car in case of an emergency. The breathing barriers now are a piece of plastic. Entirely flat. It fits in a pouch that hangs on your key chain. There is no wrong way to use it, you just lay it down and there you go. Amazing.

More shocking was the attitude toward the breathing barrier. In all of my previous classes I had been told over and over not to do CPR or rescue breathing (they don't even have rescue breathing anymore!) without a mask. NEVER. One teacher said he was supposed to tell us to let the person die if we didn't have a mask, but he said his conscience, personally, would not allow that. We were told to make the decision for ourselves.

This time the teacher talked about how the stars would have to be perfectly aligned to get any sort of disease from doing CPR without a mask. He said if we have a mask, use it. If we don't, who cares? Do CPR anyway. You'll be fine. Wow.

It was a fun class, well worth it. I loved that I was taking it with Drek. He is so wonderful. I found it funny that while Drek has never been certified in CPR before, he finished the test before me an got 100%. I took longer and missed one (It's truly pathetic that I still can't tell my left from my right in writing. But I know where to put the AED pads in reall life!). My husband is a genius.

Like I said, tonight we have another class. This class focuses on the child/infant part. Which is why we are taking the class. I'm excited!

Were There Space Monkeys? Some Terrifying Space Monkeys Maybe Got Loose?

More big projects! This time, I am trying to get me office ready. It needs to be a room for massage and infant massage classes. I received these wonderful window/mirror things and they seemed perfect, just in need of a coat of paint.

Wouldn't you know it, I found a place that would give me free paint. It was only a pint, but it was more than enough. Here is the my office before I started the project;
A close-up of the mirrors (Can you spot the sneaky cat who knows she is not supposed to be in my office?)
I taped up all the mirror-parts so I wouldn't get paint on them. I used cut up plastic bags and masking tape. This was the longest part of the project, but I am very messy, so it was vital.
I did one coat of paint and then turned them upside down so I could do another.
Drek helped me hang them. I think they are wonderful! A fantastic start, anyway!